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Making Space

Musings about authenticity and the subconscious layers protecting it.

Contract to Expand

self-awareness self-compassion self-healing self-knowledge self-love Oct 28, 2022

There are many ways we get called or tapped to do the healing work we came here to do.

 

❤️‍🩹Sometimes we're forced to stop and do the work because we get sick. Our physical bodies literally put a pause on our activities.

❤️‍🩹Sometimes it's when you get tired of self-sabotaging a goal.

❤️‍🩹Sometimes it's when we lose someone close to us and it reframes our entire world.

❤️‍🩹Sometimes it's less obvious - it's more of a feeling you get. Like every time you go to work you feel a sense of dread, foreboding, resentment...

 

There are so many ways we get called in to do this work.

 

But the call is ALWAYS to bring you back to yourself, to be more you, to share your gifts, talents, and strengths and to live your purpose.

 

💓Sometimes that purpose is disrupting generational trauma in your family; being the cycle breaker of family beliefs, habits, and emotional reactions, raising your kids differently, doing life differently. Being curious, open-minded, learning and trying new things, and stepping out of the family norm. This is incredibly courageous. 

💓Sometimes living your purpose happens through the work you do in the world. This doesn't mean everyone should make money from their hobbies and / or be an entrepreneur. It means having a connection with the work you do and with the people you work with and for. You can find incredible purpose in any job. You being you always makes a difference.

💓Sometimes living your purpose is in the way you maintain and create relationships; how you treat people. 

💓Sometimes it's through the hobby or craft you do.... and sometimes it's all of the above, or something totally different. 

 

But whatever it is - it's big. Your purpose is big, it's necessary, it's important, it's vital. You're vital to the operation.

Which is why your healing is not just for you, but for everyone you meet and not just physically, but energetically.

Your energetic pulse has ripples further and wider than you can ever imagine.  

 

 

However your purpose gets expressed you are the medium and the channel.

And if your channel is clogged with limiting beliefs and fears, it blocks you living your purpose and creates an enormous amount of resistance. 

This resistance is uncomfortable.

The typical response are attempts to self-soothe with food, alcohol, work, shopping, relationships, distractions of busy-ness and trying to outrun the anxiety and fear.

 

But if you listened closely...

the resistance is the call, the tap on the shoulder. 

 

The food, alcohol, the busy-ness and distractions, are a great quick fix and band-aid. 

I'm not saying that's right or wrong. It's just a choice. It's just your choice.

The root of the healing is in the repair with yourself.

Self-awareness, self-knowledge, self-compassion, self-love, self-healing, self-soothing.

 

 

We can try to label your purpose with a life domain like home, parenting, health, career, finance, etc...but truly your only job is to be more you and understand the resistance you create in that effort to be more you. This awareness brings healing as you get an understanding of what needs to be unlearned. Healing the false parts you created for safety. Adaptive at the time, yes; maladaptive now.

 

Our authentic desires have it perfectly worked out for us if we'd just get out of the way.

The fact that we desire something means it is meant for us.

"What is meant for you cannot pass you by." unknown

But *sometimes* triggers and sabotages ("resistance") show us what we need to let go of, and unlearn to make space for those desires. Sometimes we need to repair ourselves first.

It's not as easy as saying "just be yourself". If you've read this far, we're speaking the same language.

 

Triggers and sabotages are our map, guidepost, and wayfinder.

 

It may mean taking a detour to where you think you want to go.

One step forward sometimes feels like two steps back.

Where we get it wrong is getting overwhelmed by failure; getting annoyed with the detour; and giving up too fast. Losing faith.

It takes a lot longer if we repeatedly give up and restart.

(ask me how I know)

But if we could reframe it....

"These triggers, sabotages, and roadblocks are bringing forward what's ready to be healed to create an open channel for my desires to come through." 

Meaning: sometimes it's the inner work we need to do vs. hustling, to-do lists, or getting a new, shiny plan. 

Also: sometimes in order to expand you also need to contract. Contraction is part of it. 

With this reframe, would you lean in, instead of give up?

This is the real work.

It's healing what's inside vs. the steps your mind thinks you need to take to be as efficient as possible.

Trust me, efficiency isn't the path to happiness.🤣 You don't end up where you think you will. 

 

Answer the call.

Take the detour.

Interested in learning more about the subconscious layers protecting your authenticity? Check out my podcast.

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